Recently my mom sent me a completed sample arrangement that I’m really excited to share with you all! Seriously, I know she’s my mom, but it is so inspiring to see what she’s done!
My mom offered outright to help us out with the wedding, I’ve always suspected she has a latent talent for wedding planning, maybe it runs in the family? His parents also offered help where they can. Money is such a hard subject when it comes to weddings. I got really lucky with offers of help, but some are not so lucky. So how does one go about having “the money talk?”
Even though I ended up lucky, I started out my wedding plans thinking I would pay for it myself. I didn’t want to presume that anyone would help us. I have to say that for us, that was the best way to do things. It might be the best situation for those that feel uncomfortable about asking for money.
Here are a few tips I think may help with “the talk”:
1) Get specific. In the end, you have to fork over the full amount for everything, so it’s important to at least have the money promised to you. Have your family member quote you a specific amount or ask if they want to pay for a specific part of the wedding like the photographer or the DJ. It sounds rude to ask for specifics, so make sure you let your family member know that any amount helps, because, well, it does!
2) Let them suggest how they want to help. It makes everything much less awkward if you ask for the help and let them decide the “how.” Because, let’s be honest, any help is great.
3) And probably the best piece of advice I can give: stop listening to the places that say “So and so traditionally pays for such and such” because really, who cares? You want your family members to use their talents and funds where they’d work best. There is no need to trap anyone (including yourselves) into archaic traditions.
How did you have (or how are you going to have) the money talk? I hope your situations aren’t awkward at all, and I hope you’re as fortunate as I have been. Good luck!